Tell Them While They Are Here

Too Busy for a Friend? 

One day, a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name.  She then told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down. It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.

That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual. On Monday, she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire class was smiling. 'Really?' she heard whispered. “I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!” and, “I didn't know others liked me so much”, were most of the comments. No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another.

That group of students moved on. Several years later, one of the students was killed in Vietnam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked so handsome, so mature. The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one in line. As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. Were you Mark's math teacher?' he asked. She nodded yes. Then he said “Mark talked about you a lot”. 

After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a luncheon.  Mark's Mother and Father were there, waiting to speak with his teacher. We want to show you something his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket.  They found this on Mark when he was killed; we thought you might recognize it.  Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times.

The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him. Thank you so much for doing that, Mark's mother said.  As you can see, Mark treasured it.  All of Mark's former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, “I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home”.  Chuck's wife said, “Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album”.  “I have mine too,” Marilyn said. “It's in my diary” Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. “I carry this with me at all times,” Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, I think we all saved our lists.

 That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.

I learned today that an old friend from High School passed away.  Her name was Charisse, and if you ask me, it was way too soon.  As with many of my friends of old, I had lost touch with Charrise many years ago.  Careers, (four of them); and families, (two of them) found their way between what is now, and what was then.  But long before I was that guy from Manalapan with kids, two cars, and a house…I was that kid from Staten Island who drove a ’78 Firebird, cruised Hylan Blvd., and raced over the bridge to hit White Castle in Brooklyn before they closed.   

Today’s news brought many things.  535 elected adolescents in suits finally agreed to bankrupt us a little more slowly than last year.  A handful of other adolescents in shoulder pads agreed to take an average about $200,000 per week to entertain us through the season, and global warming turns out to be not as hot as anyone thought it was going to be (really?).  But losing one more memory of a World that given the other news of the day, my children will never be able to duplicate, was probably my one true sad thought of the weekend.  Think of it as that little note in the pocket that you can only appreciate if you had been there.

What Has America Become?

Shared with my Cousin in Arizona, I think this letter to the Editor sums it up quite well:

Has America become the land of the special interest and home of the double standard?

If we lie to Congress, it's a felony, but if the Congress lies to us, it's just politics; if a white person dislike a black person, they are racist, but if that black person dislikes a white person, it's their first amendment right to do so.  Our federal and state governments spend millions if not billions to rehabilitate criminals yet they do almost nothing for the victims.  In public schools you can teach that homosexuality is OK, but will likely be fired if you use the word G-d in the process!

It is alright to kill an unborn child, but it's wrong to many that we kill mass murderers.  It's no longer necessary to burn books we don't agree with, we re-write them and then force them on our school children, in much the same way we got rid of Communists and Socialists by simply re-naming them "Progressives"!

We allow the burning of the American Flag or an effigy of George Bush because it is a citizens first amendment right, but if we protest against President Obama, we are a terrorist or worse, a racist.  And why is it we can protect the nation of South Korea from the hordes of hungry North Koreans across the 38th parallel, but we can't keep out the millions of Mexican's and others that pour across our southern border.

It's OK to use a human fetus for medical research, but heaven forbid we use a rabbit or a rat, and while it's acceptable to share or sell porn on the internet or T.V., you are forbidden from putting a menorah or nativity scene in a public park in December!

Ritalin and video games have replaced parenting, we take money from those who work hard and give it to those who don't want to work because it's "fair", and it's commendable to support the Constitution, as long at it doesn't get in the way of someone else's ideology.

It's true that there have been times as this nation has grown that freedom and equality was slow to take root for many that shared this land, and I'm not just talking about African slavery.  The Irish escaping the famine, The Chinese migrants who help to build our railroads, the Jews and Italian's of the lower east side ghetto's of New York, and the Vietnamese and Haitian immigrants of the 1970's and 80's all can lay claim to their own scars of discrimination and inequality.  Through those times, our nation learned from it's mistakes and our children are now the beneficiaries of those lessons, but what are we as America teaching our children today?  What lessons will our current crop of youth take away from what the collapse of morality has done to the country they will inherit.

If I had the answers, I'd probably have a lot more follower!  What do you think?

Marty